1 00:02:03,660 --> 00:02:05,060 Four in the bloody morning. 2 00:02:06,380 --> 00:02:11,560 Well, I couldn't sleep, so I thought I would see if you were down for a 3 00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:12,560 session. 4 00:02:13,240 --> 00:02:17,920 Also, it's Vers, you dumbass. 5 00:02:18,520 --> 00:02:24,620 Vers is the name of the Imperial Army General who led the assault on Hoth in 6 00:02:24,620 --> 00:02:25,740 Empire Strikes Back. 7 00:02:27,100 --> 00:02:28,800 Yeah, well, whatever. 8 00:02:29,720 --> 00:02:30,760 Fucking trick. 9 00:02:31,020 --> 00:02:37,000 What did you say to me? Coffee, rock and roll, and I'll see you in the gym. 10 00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:43,500 I'm not having weird dreams again. 11 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:50,900 You need to let the breath be your emotion. 12 00:02:51,520 --> 00:02:53,620 What the fuck is that supposed to mean? 13 00:02:57,400 --> 00:02:59,800 The warrior shows emotion. 14 00:03:00,120 --> 00:03:01,120 It's very. 15 00:03:06,260 --> 00:03:11,020 Danger. It's birth, goddammit! And if you wanted someone that shows no 16 00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:13,380 you should have cast Brie Larson. 17 00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:16,880 Shit. 18 00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:22,800 I slipped. 19 00:03:23,560 --> 00:03:27,940 Right. Due to me blasting you for not being able to pull off a decent American 20 00:03:27,940 --> 00:03:30,280 accent. Alright, how about this for an American accent? 21 00:03:30,540 --> 00:03:31,499 Hey, bro! 22 00:03:31,500 --> 00:03:34,080 How about some flaccid? I learned this the other day. 23 00:03:38,100 --> 00:03:43,000 Yeah, remember, you could lose your photons that power at any time. 24 00:03:43,780 --> 00:03:45,940 Except it comes from that implant that I put in your neck. 25 00:03:52,180 --> 00:03:56,520 And yeah, it does look a lot like the power inhibitor implant from Angels and 26 00:03:56,520 --> 00:04:00,580 Shields, crossed with the shock controller from Thor Ragnarok. 27 00:04:01,120 --> 00:04:02,120 I'm not going to get into that. 28 00:04:03,220 --> 00:04:04,360 Yeah, let's not. 29 00:04:08,460 --> 00:04:11,180 So, tell me about these dreams. 30 00:04:12,080 --> 00:04:13,080 What did you see? 31 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:21,600 That's true. I don't know. It's like 32 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:24,320 a kind of porn, actually. 33 00:04:28,280 --> 00:04:29,280 That's a girl. 34 00:04:31,810 --> 00:04:35,370 Oh. Do you know what the supreme intelligence looks like? 35 00:04:38,210 --> 00:04:42,010 Nobody knows what the supreme intelligence looks like. It's true, 36 00:04:42,010 --> 00:04:43,010 this. 37 00:04:43,310 --> 00:04:46,750 Our subconscious chooses how it appears to us. 38 00:04:47,270 --> 00:04:50,350 It could resemble someone to admire. 39 00:04:53,890 --> 00:04:55,230 What is that? Oh. 40 00:04:57,469 --> 00:05:00,030 which would explain the sexual nature of these visions. 41 00:05:01,710 --> 00:05:05,550 Tell me, do you see me in your dreams? 42 00:05:05,830 --> 00:05:08,190 Oh, not at all, actually. 43 00:05:44,490 --> 00:05:47,450 You've been staring at my tits, bouncing around all day. 44 00:05:48,210 --> 00:05:49,210 Oh, you noticed? 45 00:05:49,530 --> 00:05:53,990 But I never get to know what a real woman feels like. Oh, I do, do I? Yeah. 46 00:05:54,550 --> 00:05:56,410 You want me to kick your ass? 47 00:05:56,930 --> 00:05:58,830 You're very sure of yourself, aren't you, darling? 48 00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:05,770 Your mouth is more useful there. 49 00:06:08,130 --> 00:06:09,210 You're right about that. 50 00:06:17,020 --> 00:06:18,440 Yes, just like that. 51 00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:22,440 Yes. 52 00:06:39,980 --> 00:06:41,540 Stick your tongue out further. 53 00:06:42,220 --> 00:06:43,220 Yes. 54 00:06:43,880 --> 00:06:46,100 What else did you think my pussy was glowing? 55 00:06:55,170 --> 00:06:57,870 I need some of that. 56 00:07:20,430 --> 00:07:21,430 That's what you need to have. 57 00:08:25,300 --> 00:08:26,700 You are a dirty girl, aren't you? 58 00:09:29,820 --> 00:09:31,220 Don't do it like that. Don't do it. 59 00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:44,120 Yeah, fuck yeah. 60 00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:50,500 Fuck yeah. 61 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:24,060 You're not pissed I woke you up in the morning. 62 00:10:24,420 --> 00:10:26,540 I think I got over it. Yeah. 63 00:10:27,640 --> 00:10:28,840 I fucking will. 64 00:10:35,380 --> 00:10:37,660 It's four o 'clock in the fucking morning. 65 00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:42,080 You don't have to fucking mock me, don't you? 66 00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:45,500 You don't want my cocking up, right? 67 00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:50,540 I think it's dick -sucking o 'clock in the morning. 68 00:10:50,780 --> 00:10:51,820 Yeah, I think you're fucking right. 69 00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:59,060 Fuck yeah, I like 70 00:10:59,060 --> 00:11:00,520 that. Nice try. 71 00:11:39,979 --> 00:11:40,979 Fuck me. 72 00:11:43,580 --> 00:11:46,720 Fuck yeah, suck those fucking balls. Jack my cock wave. 73 00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:38,680 Mm -hmm. 74 00:13:11,930 --> 00:13:13,850 There you go. There you go. 75 00:13:14,350 --> 00:13:15,810 Yes, yes, yes. 76 00:13:16,090 --> 00:13:17,610 How could one get to my pussy? 77 00:13:36,520 --> 00:13:37,920 Yes. 78 00:13:39,020 --> 00:13:40,420 Yes. 79 00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:43,320 Yes. 80 00:14:15,020 --> 00:14:17,120 Oh, monster, monster, monster. 81 00:14:47,500 --> 00:14:49,180 Yes, do it more, do it more, do it more. 82 00:18:05,420 --> 00:18:06,420 Yes, do it. 83 00:18:42,660 --> 00:18:44,180 Is that what you really want? 84 00:18:44,420 --> 00:18:45,420 Yes, do it. 85 00:18:50,760 --> 00:18:56,220 You really feel my fingers on the other side, don't you? 86 00:18:58,440 --> 00:18:59,299 Don't you? 87 00:18:59,300 --> 00:19:00,300 Fuck you. 88 00:19:32,970 --> 00:19:33,970 Let's do it again. 89 00:20:55,530 --> 00:20:57,710 Oh, this is fucking long. 90 00:21:26,990 --> 00:21:28,310 God, fuck you. 91 00:21:28,850 --> 00:21:30,350 Fuck the couple, man. 92 00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:06,540 I'm going to do what I want. 93 00:22:06,940 --> 00:22:08,760 I'm going to do what I want. 94 00:22:09,360 --> 00:22:10,820 Oh, fuck. 95 00:22:11,140 --> 00:22:12,860 Oh, fuck. 96 00:22:13,940 --> 00:22:14,940 Oh. 97 00:22:16,780 --> 00:22:19,180 Oh. Oh. Oh. 98 00:22:19,580 --> 00:22:20,680 Oh. Oh. Oh. 99 00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:22,040 Oh. 100 00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:23,640 Oh. 101 00:22:32,720 --> 00:22:36,220 Fuck. Have some bloody good fucking shit, Beth. 102 00:22:36,820 --> 00:22:37,820 Fuck. 103 00:22:41,220 --> 00:22:42,220 Oh, yes. 104 00:22:51,780 --> 00:22:54,400 Come here, you little fucking ass. Yes. 105 00:22:56,720 --> 00:22:57,720 Come here, Laura. 106 00:22:57,840 --> 00:23:01,300 Oh, nice and slow. Just like that. 107 00:23:02,770 --> 00:23:04,710 Oh my fucking god. 108 00:23:05,150 --> 00:23:06,150 Yes. 109 00:23:07,430 --> 00:23:11,390 Oh, fuck yeah. 110 00:23:12,930 --> 00:23:13,930 Oh, 111 00:23:15,090 --> 00:23:16,090 fuck. 112 00:23:16,850 --> 00:23:17,850 Oh, 113 00:23:20,190 --> 00:23:24,710 Virgie, take that cock like a fucking champion. 114 00:23:30,990 --> 00:23:32,110 I'm gonna rub my pussy. 115 00:23:32,970 --> 00:23:33,970 Oh, fuck. 116 00:23:34,230 --> 00:23:35,230 Fuck. 117 00:23:36,630 --> 00:23:41,710 Here it comes. 118 00:23:43,190 --> 00:23:44,190 Here it comes. 119 00:24:18,380 --> 00:24:19,380 That was bloody marvelous. 120 00:24:21,960 --> 00:24:27,380 I think I'm going to call you Miss Marvel. 121 00:24:28,580 --> 00:24:31,180 Uh, I'd rather you not. 122 00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:33,300 You know what, you're right. 123 00:24:34,120 --> 00:24:36,280 I would be totally disrespectful to your rent. 124 00:24:38,700 --> 00:24:43,880 How about Captain Marvel? 125 00:24:47,180 --> 00:24:48,840 That does have a nice wing to it. 126 00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:50,080 Yeah? 127 00:24:50,620 --> 00:24:53,620 So you ready for tomorrow's mission? 128 00:24:54,800 --> 00:24:55,820 Don't I look ready? 129 00:24:58,780 --> 00:24:59,780 Yep. 130 00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:03,840 You look ready, all right. 131 00:25:04,660 --> 00:25:05,820 But you'll be on your own. 132 00:25:06,420 --> 00:25:09,980 And we can't risk the squirrels capturing you and mind -fracking through 133 00:25:09,980 --> 00:25:10,980 memories. 134 00:25:11,280 --> 00:25:13,520 Like the eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. 135 00:25:14,740 --> 00:25:15,740 True. 136 00:25:16,630 --> 00:25:18,950 Although, Jim Carrey was actually good in that. 137 00:25:20,310 --> 00:25:24,430 And, is it just me, or do the scrolls kind of look like the mask? 138 00:25:26,150 --> 00:25:27,150 Smoking! 139 00:25:32,770 --> 00:25:33,770 Alright, 140 00:25:36,070 --> 00:25:40,870 no matter what happens, don't get caught. And if you do get caught, don't 141 00:25:40,870 --> 00:25:41,469 them anything. 142 00:25:41,470 --> 00:25:44,550 There's a lot of dirty little secrets hidden in that mind of yours. 143 00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:46,960 I mean, I should know. 144 00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:48,000 I put them there. 145 00:25:49,260 --> 00:25:50,560 Copy that. No motion. 146 00:25:51,040 --> 00:25:52,040 That's my girl. 147 00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:55,600 I think what you meant to say was, yes, Captain. 148 00:25:58,880 --> 00:25:59,880 Yes, Captain. 149 00:26:01,560 --> 00:26:02,560 That's a good boy. 150 00:26:02,660 --> 00:26:05,620 Now, let me go kick some Skrull ass. 151 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:07,000 Over and out. 152 00:26:09,220 --> 00:26:10,520 Me getting caught. 153 00:26:10,820 --> 00:26:12,960 These little green goblins could ever. 154 00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:43,640 Sing, Amra. 155 00:26:46,540 --> 00:26:48,180 Sing, Amra. 156 00:27:21,449 --> 00:27:22,850 Oh, 157 00:27:23,810 --> 00:27:23,810 my 158 00:27:23,810 --> 00:27:33,250 God. 159 00:27:46,459 --> 00:27:49,260 Thank you. 160 00:28:31,530 --> 00:28:32,530 Cool. 161 00:29:26,639 --> 00:29:29,220 I'm glad you stuck your friend's cock. 162 00:29:47,699 --> 00:29:49,100 Yes. 163 00:29:51,460 --> 00:29:52,860 Yes. 164 00:30:12,510 --> 00:30:13,510 Yeah. 165 00:30:15,330 --> 00:30:16,330 Oh, 166 00:30:17,150 --> 00:30:21,350 you're going to look good. Yeah. 167 00:30:22,330 --> 00:30:26,350 Oh, you think you're going to stick those girl cocks inside of me? Mm -hmm. 168 00:31:50,539 --> 00:31:53,940 Oh, my God. 169 00:33:46,570 --> 00:33:48,670 Yes, yes. 170 00:34:18,190 --> 00:34:19,929 Looks like you haven't fucked in a while. 171 00:34:21,870 --> 00:34:24,389 I don't get pussyed very often, do you up here? 172 00:34:33,150 --> 00:34:34,150 Yes. 173 00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:04,280 That looks so good, doesn't it? 174 00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:10,520 Yes, right there. 175 00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:27,840 Thank you. 176 00:38:43,920 --> 00:38:44,920 Thank you. 177 00:39:38,220 --> 00:39:39,480 I'm going to blame you. 178 00:42:15,390 --> 00:42:16,690 Oh, fuck. 179 00:42:51,069 --> 00:42:53,870 Thank you. 180 00:43:20,300 --> 00:43:21,660 I love you. 181 00:43:50,640 --> 00:43:52,000 I told you guys I'd show you some emotion. 182 00:43:53,940 --> 00:43:56,920 Is that enough for you? 183 00:44:07,080 --> 00:44:10,000 I'm going to show you both what it's like to come from a real woman. 184 00:44:22,899 --> 00:44:23,899 Bring those movies. 185 00:44:24,400 --> 00:44:26,460 Bring those movies. 186 00:44:27,400 --> 00:44:28,660 I want you to give me all that. 187 00:44:28,940 --> 00:44:30,500 Give me all of it. 188 00:44:31,580 --> 00:44:33,180 Give me it. 189 00:44:34,200 --> 00:44:35,560 Give me those fucking balls. 190 00:44:35,820 --> 00:44:36,820 I want all of that. 191 00:44:36,880 --> 00:44:37,880 Come on. 192 00:44:38,220 --> 00:44:39,220 Give me it. 193 00:44:40,860 --> 00:44:43,360 I showed you some fucking emotion. Now give me it. 194 00:44:43,640 --> 00:44:44,640 Come on. Give me it. 195 00:44:45,280 --> 00:44:46,280 All of it. 196 00:44:47,840 --> 00:44:48,940 Every last drop. 197 00:44:49,180 --> 00:44:50,180 Come on. 198 00:44:54,160 --> 00:44:55,160 Nah, come on. 199 00:45:00,040 --> 00:45:06,980 Alright guys, 200 00:45:07,180 --> 00:45:09,800 well, thank you for the ride. 201 00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:11,840 I'm gonna get the fuck out of here. 202 00:45:31,910 --> 00:45:32,910 Night. 203 00:45:37,070 --> 00:45:39,230 Oh, that's convenient. 204 00:45:51,690 --> 00:45:53,670 Where's the Starforce Command V copy? 205 00:45:55,130 --> 00:45:56,130 Viv? 206 00:45:56,550 --> 00:45:57,550 Good lord. 207 00:45:57,670 --> 00:45:59,730 Where are you? I have no idea. 208 00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:01,940 The Skrulls captured me. 209 00:46:02,180 --> 00:46:07,440 I ran away and stole one of their escape pods. I just... I can't find the 210 00:46:07,440 --> 00:46:08,920 goddamn owner's manual. 211 00:46:09,660 --> 00:46:11,520 Do you know how to pilot one of these things? 212 00:46:12,680 --> 00:46:13,680 Uh, nope. 213 00:46:14,000 --> 00:46:15,000 Sorry, Captain. 214 00:46:15,780 --> 00:46:18,920 Are you sure? 215 00:46:19,160 --> 00:46:25,600 Or are you retaliating because you're still butthurt? You didn't end up 216 00:46:25,600 --> 00:46:26,600 Mar -Vell. 217 00:46:27,540 --> 00:46:28,540 Absolute nonsense. 218 00:46:29,240 --> 00:46:31,280 You know I'll be revealed as Mar -Vell in the sequel? 219 00:46:31,720 --> 00:46:32,720 Yeah, no. 220 00:46:32,980 --> 00:46:37,420 But they did get you to hit the gym by dangling that carrot in front of you. So 221 00:46:37,420 --> 00:46:38,218 there's that. 222 00:46:38,220 --> 00:46:39,220 You're fully mistaken. 223 00:46:39,580 --> 00:46:43,900 And also, it looks like you're about to crash onto planet C -53. 224 00:46:44,820 --> 00:46:45,820 Right. 225 00:46:56,260 --> 00:46:58,020 That one's only 20 calories. 226 00:47:25,640 --> 00:47:26,640 Please, motherfucker! 227 00:47:31,240 --> 00:47:33,960 Do you understand me? 228 00:47:34,420 --> 00:47:37,920 Is my universal translator working? 229 00:47:39,060 --> 00:47:40,740 Yeah, I understand you. 230 00:47:40,940 --> 00:47:42,960 Well, let's see if you understand me. 231 00:47:43,280 --> 00:47:46,400 Put your motherfucking hands in the air! 232 00:47:49,660 --> 00:47:51,480 Star Force Command, do you copy? 233 00:47:54,380 --> 00:47:55,380 Let me guess. 234 00:47:56,320 --> 00:47:57,320 Yeah, yeah, whatever. 235 00:47:57,940 --> 00:47:58,940 Look, 236 00:47:59,180 --> 00:48:04,040 I'm on this dumb planet, and there's a guy in here that looks like Samuel L. 237 00:48:04,040 --> 00:48:05,620 Jackson from Pulp Fiction. 238 00:48:06,500 --> 00:48:09,600 He's putting some sort of ancient -looking flash around me. 239 00:48:11,180 --> 00:48:12,440 Beam me up, Scotty. 240 00:48:13,160 --> 00:48:14,160 Sorry, Viz. 241 00:48:14,580 --> 00:48:19,380 It seems like they took you from the epic space movie quadrant over to the 242 00:48:19,380 --> 00:48:20,380 cop movie quadrant. 243 00:48:20,660 --> 00:48:22,960 It's going to take at least one full act to get you there. 244 00:48:23,500 --> 00:48:26,880 Please try staying one piece until we can fix the genre, okay? 245 00:48:27,700 --> 00:48:30,040 In the meantime, why don't you go to Louisiana? 246 00:48:30,620 --> 00:48:33,020 Try and find Maria Rambeau. Who? 247 00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:35,400 I've been free, motherfucker! 248 00:48:39,040 --> 00:48:40,040 Sorry, 249 00:48:41,160 --> 00:48:42,118 what was that? 250 00:48:42,120 --> 00:48:45,600 Who's this Rambeau girl, and is Stallone involved? 251 00:48:46,200 --> 00:48:47,960 She's the black girl you see in your dreams. 252 00:48:48,240 --> 00:48:49,840 You guys used to be best friends. 253 00:48:51,790 --> 00:48:53,890 Maybe something a little bit more than that if you ask me. 254 00:48:54,570 --> 00:48:55,690 Where do I find her? 255 00:48:56,150 --> 00:48:59,150 The scrolls were looking for a coordinate to a house in your brain. 256 00:48:59,390 --> 00:49:01,390 So I guess you already know where to go. 257 00:49:03,070 --> 00:49:04,070 Fine. 258 00:49:04,210 --> 00:49:10,830 I'll just do a quick cerebral search and get my new mismatched partner to 259 00:49:10,830 --> 00:49:11,830 drive me there. 260 00:49:18,830 --> 00:49:19,830 Got it. 261 00:49:21,040 --> 00:49:22,680 Yo, buddy, what's your name again? 262 00:49:23,440 --> 00:49:24,440 Fury. 263 00:49:25,320 --> 00:49:27,120 Nicholas Joseph Fury. 264 00:49:28,920 --> 00:49:29,920 All right, serious. 265 00:49:30,580 --> 00:49:33,080 I'm going to need you to help me find my best friend. 266 00:49:33,600 --> 00:49:34,600 Help you? 267 00:49:34,980 --> 00:49:37,740 You just went galactic on my eye, space lady. 268 00:49:39,400 --> 00:49:40,780 I don't even know your name. 269 00:49:41,280 --> 00:49:42,680 Neither do I, actually. 270 00:49:43,880 --> 00:49:49,340 They call me Verz, but I suspect there's more to that than meets the eye. 271 00:49:50,410 --> 00:49:51,490 No pun intended. 272 00:49:52,530 --> 00:49:56,630 I guess you could call me Captain Marvel. 273 00:49:57,410 --> 00:49:59,690 Shit. You a captain? 274 00:50:00,770 --> 00:50:05,770 Look, I've been having these really weird dreams lately. 275 00:50:07,830 --> 00:50:12,270 I have this feeling half the universe is about to be wiped out. 276 00:50:13,250 --> 00:50:14,530 Just like that. 277 00:50:16,510 --> 00:50:18,670 I really need your help, Sirius. 278 00:50:19,850 --> 00:50:21,410 We don't have much time. 279 00:50:24,110 --> 00:50:25,110 It's viewer week. 280 00:50:26,690 --> 00:50:28,410 And you're going to need some proper clothes. 281 00:50:29,190 --> 00:50:32,050 Yeah, and you're going to need a haircut and an eye patch. 282 00:51:03,500 --> 00:51:08,400 So you may have a spaceship, but I got me an Italian sports car. 283 00:51:13,700 --> 00:51:14,700 Nice. 284 00:51:26,920 --> 00:51:28,640 So, where are we going? 285 00:51:29,020 --> 00:51:31,260 29 .9511 North. 286 00:51:31,790 --> 00:51:35,770 90 .0715 West. Ah, coordinates. 287 00:51:36,430 --> 00:51:40,310 Well, here is my GPS. 288 00:51:48,570 --> 00:51:51,290 And here is your lunch. 289 00:51:51,830 --> 00:51:53,550 Oh, shit. 290 00:51:53,990 --> 00:51:55,990 I knew I left it somewhere. 291 00:52:00,910 --> 00:52:03,030 Now this is one tasty burger. 292 00:52:07,450 --> 00:52:09,410 Looks like this place called Norlin. 293 00:52:10,270 --> 00:52:11,910 What? Nola? 294 00:52:13,270 --> 00:52:17,070 Are you out of your motherfucking mind? That's 3 ,000 miles away from here. 295 00:52:19,470 --> 00:52:20,650 Don't worry, Sirius. 296 00:52:20,910 --> 00:52:22,970 I'll make the ride enjoyable for you. 297 00:52:23,890 --> 00:52:25,730 You make me feel good. 298 00:52:58,390 --> 00:52:59,910 Don't crash the car, Furious. 299 00:54:30,779 --> 00:54:33,400 You're not mad at me for blasting your eye anymore, are you? 300 00:54:34,060 --> 00:54:35,060 What eye? 301 00:54:56,110 --> 00:54:57,110 Oh, God. 302 00:55:41,070 --> 00:55:42,070 That's it, don't stop. 303 00:55:48,990 --> 00:55:50,150 Just like that. 304 00:55:53,850 --> 00:55:54,370 You 305 00:55:54,370 --> 00:56:05,390 better 306 00:56:05,390 --> 00:56:09,190 be watching the road, Ferris, with your one eye. 307 00:56:29,230 --> 00:56:30,230 God, that's good. 308 00:57:03,150 --> 00:57:05,610 Keep your hands on the wheels, Furious. Oh, God. 309 00:57:07,310 --> 00:57:08,910 Oh, that's it, girl. 310 00:57:09,630 --> 00:57:10,630 That's it. I'm close. 311 00:57:11,470 --> 00:57:12,470 I'm close. 312 00:57:12,750 --> 00:57:13,750 I'm close. 313 00:57:54,000 --> 00:57:55,220 Your tongue feels so fucking good. 314 00:57:55,740 --> 00:57:56,740 Oh, my God. 315 00:57:56,980 --> 00:57:59,240 Watch the road, Furious. Oh, fuck, yeah. 316 00:58:05,620 --> 00:58:12,460 Keep your hands in the wheelchair. 317 00:58:14,280 --> 00:58:15,280 One more. 318 00:58:18,400 --> 00:58:19,400 Oh, yeah. 319 00:58:19,600 --> 00:58:20,700 Oh, yeah. 320 00:58:21,360 --> 00:58:23,520 Paying attention with your one eye? Yeah. 321 00:58:26,170 --> 00:58:27,690 Shit, girl, it's not my fault. 322 00:58:28,490 --> 00:58:29,630 You blasted me. 323 00:58:31,710 --> 00:58:34,010 Yeah, you really do need to be blasted, huh? 324 00:58:34,370 --> 00:58:35,590 I'm about to blast. 325 00:58:35,830 --> 00:58:36,830 Yeah? 326 00:58:42,410 --> 00:58:48,910 Keep your hand on the... You 327 00:58:48,910 --> 00:58:52,710 didn't land on this dumb planet to die on it. 328 00:59:33,010 --> 00:59:34,450 Oh, fuck. 329 00:59:35,390 --> 00:59:36,650 Oh, God. 330 00:59:41,730 --> 00:59:45,430 I think you made a mess there. Oh, God. 331 00:59:48,630 --> 00:59:50,590 Keep driving. I'm trying. 332 00:59:53,690 --> 00:59:54,690 Again? 333 01:00:19,820 --> 01:00:20,900 Now that was exhausting. 334 01:00:21,280 --> 01:00:22,820 You make me feel good. 335 01:00:25,060 --> 01:00:26,280 Tell me about it. 336 01:00:27,100 --> 01:00:28,560 I feel like Johnny. 337 01:00:29,200 --> 01:00:30,740 But it was still worth it, right? 338 01:01:44,170 --> 01:01:45,170 There she is. 339 01:01:45,590 --> 01:01:48,350 Seems like all that blowing's finally jogged your memory. 340 01:01:49,650 --> 01:01:50,650 Hmm? 341 01:01:51,050 --> 01:01:52,350 I know what you're thinking. 342 01:01:53,310 --> 01:01:57,570 Where's the record player in? Why didn't you play Come As You Are by Nirvana? 343 01:01:58,190 --> 01:02:03,350 Well, my dear, that's because nobody gave a shit about vinyl in 1990, which 344 01:02:03,350 --> 01:02:04,930 the year you allegedly left the earth. 345 01:02:05,710 --> 01:02:11,110 And Come As You Are came out in 91, so there's no fucking way that could have 346 01:02:11,110 --> 01:02:12,110 been in your brain. 347 01:02:13,560 --> 01:02:17,380 Actually, I'm just wondering why I turned a different color in the third 348 01:02:18,180 --> 01:02:19,560 Oh, that. 349 01:02:20,380 --> 01:02:25,440 Well, the fans went ballistic when some set pictures of Brie Larkin wearing the 350 01:02:25,440 --> 01:02:26,440 green costume leaked. 351 01:02:26,560 --> 01:02:31,220 I mean, I'm not sure if it was the color or the fact that she had no act. 352 01:02:31,520 --> 01:02:36,360 But trust me, we've done plenty of reshoots, and just pretend the red and 353 01:02:36,360 --> 01:02:37,700 costume was the plan all along. 354 01:02:38,020 --> 01:02:41,500 Uh, this is not the mainstream movie, and... 355 01:02:42,000 --> 01:02:43,180 I'm not Brie Larson. 356 01:02:46,120 --> 01:02:49,620 Okay. The green costume of a nightmare with all those greens. 357 01:02:50,080 --> 01:02:51,080 Happy now? 358 01:02:52,180 --> 01:02:56,300 Yeah. That makes more sense. But who the fuck are you? 359 01:02:56,860 --> 01:03:01,820 I thought you were supposed to resemble somebody I admire. 360 01:03:04,480 --> 01:03:08,820 Or... Desire? 361 01:03:10,100 --> 01:03:15,060 Look. No offense, you're pretty and all, but I'm really into dick. 362 01:03:16,840 --> 01:03:17,840 Really now? 363 01:03:22,040 --> 01:03:23,200 Now we're talking. 364 01:06:50,000 --> 01:06:51,400 Yes! 365 01:07:43,020 --> 01:07:44,860 She may not have the same intelligence. 366 01:12:23,120 --> 01:12:24,120 I don't know. 367 01:13:32,910 --> 01:13:33,910 What the fuck, girl? 368 01:13:37,170 --> 01:13:39,270 Sorry, I got lightheaded for a moment. 369 01:13:44,110 --> 01:13:45,230 Are you alright? 370 01:13:46,810 --> 01:13:47,930 I think so. 371 01:13:53,450 --> 01:13:54,630 Is this the place? 372 01:13:55,290 --> 01:13:57,190 Yeah, this is definitely the place. 373 01:13:57,790 --> 01:14:01,470 Good. Because I could use me a nap and a bidet. 374 01:14:01,800 --> 01:14:02,800 A what? 375 01:14:03,180 --> 01:14:04,180 A bidet. 376 01:14:04,520 --> 01:14:05,520 It's French. 377 01:14:05,580 --> 01:14:06,760 For ass wash. 378 01:14:08,100 --> 01:14:11,120 Hey, you know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in France? 379 01:14:27,620 --> 01:14:30,740 Excuse me, ma 'am. I was wondering if we could ask you for... 380 01:14:31,320 --> 01:14:32,320 Ah, motherfucker. 381 01:14:32,980 --> 01:14:34,220 Jesus fucking Christ. 382 01:14:34,560 --> 01:14:37,160 How many times are you guys going to come up here and bunk the shit out of 383 01:14:37,600 --> 01:14:41,220 I don't want to discuss your holy word. I like to have transfusions all the 384 01:14:41,220 --> 01:14:44,780 time. And y 'all can go to hell, which I'm sure you're told all day long. 385 01:14:45,320 --> 01:14:47,160 And it's probably why you don't even think hell exists. 386 01:14:47,700 --> 01:14:48,700 Whoa. 387 01:14:49,340 --> 01:14:50,340 Take it easy. 388 01:14:50,500 --> 01:14:52,280 We'll not have to hold the twinness as I promised. 389 01:14:53,280 --> 01:14:59,040 I'm just an amnesiac Star Force captain who has some strangely erotic dreams 390 01:14:59,040 --> 01:15:00,480 about this place. 391 01:15:01,440 --> 01:15:02,440 Oh. 392 01:15:02,840 --> 01:15:04,760 Okay, well, come on in. 393 01:15:16,320 --> 01:15:17,320 Wow. 394 01:15:18,540 --> 01:15:22,800 I think I actually remember taking this picture. 395 01:15:23,720 --> 01:15:24,720 Oh, really? 396 01:15:25,060 --> 01:15:26,560 Do you remember taking these? 397 01:15:39,760 --> 01:15:41,440 Are you sure you're not Maria Rambeau? 398 01:15:44,200 --> 01:15:47,580 Like I said before, sugar tits, Maria is my mama. 399 01:15:47,800 --> 01:15:48,800 She did. 400 01:15:49,220 --> 01:15:50,500 I am Monica. 401 01:15:50,940 --> 01:15:51,940 Monica. 402 01:15:53,900 --> 01:15:54,900 Shit. 403 01:15:55,820 --> 01:15:58,420 I'm going to be left with all these unanswered questions. 404 01:15:59,420 --> 01:16:00,500 Who am I? 405 01:16:01,240 --> 01:16:06,260 Why is my Air Force call sign Avenger when in the comics it was Cheeseburger? 406 01:16:07,220 --> 01:16:10,520 And... Aren't the Knights supposed to have some sort of Boston accent? 407 01:16:21,380 --> 01:16:22,380 Listen, 408 01:16:34,320 --> 01:16:36,960 there's some things that I haven't told you. 409 01:16:37,580 --> 01:16:38,580 Oh, really? 410 01:16:38,800 --> 01:16:40,900 You and everybody else? 411 01:16:42,680 --> 01:16:43,680 Secrets? 412 01:16:44,180 --> 01:16:45,180 Lies? 413 01:16:46,840 --> 01:16:47,840 Ordnance? 414 01:16:48,360 --> 01:16:49,360 Implanted in my head? 415 01:16:51,840 --> 01:16:54,220 I'm so fucking tired of this stuff. 416 01:16:56,700 --> 01:16:58,620 No, wait. No, you listen! 417 01:16:58,980 --> 01:17:04,100 Do you know what it feels like to be rejected by your own kind because you're 418 01:17:04,100 --> 01:17:05,100 different? 419 01:17:05,710 --> 01:17:09,350 Feeling like you're not enough because you'll never measure up to whatever 420 01:17:09,350 --> 01:17:16,050 idealized version of you they fabricated, being used, lied to, cheated 421 01:17:16,050 --> 01:17:17,050 never knowing why? 422 01:17:21,210 --> 01:17:22,650 Look at me. 423 01:17:23,290 --> 01:17:27,710 I have no memory, no purpose, and no emotion. 424 01:17:31,030 --> 01:17:32,250 I'm sorry, Monica. 425 01:17:32,490 --> 01:17:35,050 I hope you never have to know what this feels like. 426 01:17:40,520 --> 01:17:43,360 Are you... Are you crying? 427 01:17:44,420 --> 01:17:47,800 Yes, I'm crying, goddammit! And now I'm screaming too! 428 01:17:48,480 --> 01:17:51,880 How else am I supposed to get a fucking Best Actress nomination? 429 01:17:56,060 --> 01:17:57,060 Right? 430 01:17:59,340 --> 01:18:00,340 Anyways. 431 01:18:01,300 --> 01:18:03,860 I was a lieutenant in the New Orleans Harbor Patrol. 432 01:18:04,420 --> 01:18:06,280 And I was captain of their cargo ship. 433 01:18:08,300 --> 01:18:09,340 There was an accident. 434 01:18:10,120 --> 01:18:12,200 I was exposed to extra -dimensional energy. 435 01:18:13,680 --> 01:18:16,640 As a result, I can convert my body into energy. 436 01:18:21,000 --> 01:18:26,520 So, what are you saying? You're some type of superhero? 437 01:18:27,800 --> 01:18:28,860 Damn right I am. 438 01:18:34,480 --> 01:18:38,280 They call me Captain Marvel. 439 01:18:42,019 --> 01:18:44,940 Uh, I think we're gonna have a problem here. 440 01:18:47,500 --> 01:18:49,440 Hi, I'm Captain Marvel. 441 01:18:49,720 --> 01:18:51,160 You gotta be fucking kidding me. 442 01:18:51,680 --> 01:18:52,860 Yeah. No. 443 01:18:53,340 --> 01:18:55,980 But hey, where is that the fuck out of you? 444 01:18:56,400 --> 01:19:00,600 How about you change your name to something stupid that allows us to 445 01:19:01,320 --> 01:19:03,820 Until they inevitably write you off. 446 01:19:04,880 --> 01:19:08,640 I'm thinking something like... Photon? 447 01:19:17,550 --> 01:19:18,550 I have a good one. 448 01:19:19,030 --> 01:19:20,030 Pulsar? 449 01:19:23,050 --> 01:19:24,050 Spectrum? 450 01:19:30,690 --> 01:19:31,790 Yo, bitch! 451 01:19:32,910 --> 01:19:34,370 I'm not changing shit! 452 01:19:34,930 --> 01:19:41,250 Why don't you start calling yourself something cheesy like Warbird or Binary? 453 01:19:49,100 --> 01:19:50,260 I've got a better idea. 454 01:19:51,060 --> 01:19:54,080 How about we both suck the shit out of each other? 455 01:19:55,640 --> 01:19:58,740 And the first one who comes has to change your name. 456 01:20:00,160 --> 01:20:02,460 Are you sure you want to go there? 457 01:20:03,100 --> 01:20:05,700 My tongue is why they call me Captain Marvel on the job. 458 01:20:06,360 --> 01:20:08,180 It can work wonders on your clip, sister. 459 01:20:08,880 --> 01:20:09,880 Well, 460 01:20:10,420 --> 01:20:12,440 Shazam, let's see what you've got. 461 01:20:22,050 --> 01:20:23,850 um um 462 01:21:10,730 --> 01:21:15,070 You know, by the end of this, you're going to be calling me Captain Marvel. 463 01:21:15,070 --> 01:21:16,070 yeah? 464 01:22:01,730 --> 01:22:02,730 Mm -hmm. 465 01:23:15,520 --> 01:23:21,860 Yeah, yeah Yes, 466 01:23:21,860 --> 01:23:27,300 yes, like 467 01:23:27,300 --> 01:23:31,900 that 468 01:26:14,900 --> 01:26:15,900 Yes, please. 469 01:26:16,060 --> 01:26:17,060 Yes, please. 470 01:26:17,980 --> 01:26:19,040 That's so good. 471 01:26:19,820 --> 01:26:20,820 Yeah. 472 01:26:23,580 --> 01:26:24,580 Oh, 473 01:26:25,120 --> 01:26:26,840 that's so good. 474 01:26:27,480 --> 01:26:28,820 Yeah, yeah. 475 01:26:29,320 --> 01:26:31,140 Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. 476 01:26:31,700 --> 01:26:32,700 Oh, 477 01:26:33,080 --> 01:26:33,999 that's good. 478 01:26:34,000 --> 01:26:35,000 Yeah. 479 01:27:58,510 --> 01:27:59,510 Yes. Yes, 480 01:28:00,090 --> 01:28:02,110 yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. 481 01:28:03,470 --> 01:28:04,470 Yes. 482 01:28:07,450 --> 01:28:09,150 Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. 483 01:29:30,250 --> 01:29:31,250 We can get some ass. 484 01:29:33,150 --> 01:29:36,210 So you were standing here this whole time and you didn't join in? 485 01:29:38,270 --> 01:29:39,390 You're dumber than you look. 486 01:29:45,610 --> 01:29:47,910 All right, all right. 487 01:29:48,390 --> 01:29:49,390 Photon it is. 488 01:29:50,790 --> 01:29:51,790 Atta girl. 489 01:29:53,430 --> 01:29:55,090 But ain't nobody gonna write me off. 490 01:29:55,650 --> 01:29:58,410 I'm a strong black independent woman and I'm here to stay. 491 01:30:02,480 --> 01:30:04,000 What the fuck? 492 01:30:08,520 --> 01:30:09,520 Motherfucker. 493 01:30:23,380 --> 01:30:24,380 Wait. 494 01:30:25,500 --> 01:30:26,640 The snapper. 495 01:30:28,500 --> 01:30:30,140 I've got to find a way to undo this. 496 01:30:34,160 --> 01:30:35,600 Fuck it. It worked for Superman. 497 01:30:56,440 --> 01:30:57,440 Show it again. 498 01:30:58,280 --> 01:30:59,280 Oh, hey. 499 01:30:59,500 --> 01:31:02,480 Oh, here, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty. Look at that. 500 01:31:11,420 --> 01:31:12,900 That's not a pussy. 501 01:31:14,020 --> 01:31:15,020 Ah, here we go. 502 01:31:15,340 --> 01:31:16,640 Typical kitty pussy joke. 503 01:31:17,620 --> 01:31:20,760 I guess we're jumping the shark and doing the wood rocket thing now. It's a 504 01:31:20,760 --> 01:31:22,020 flerken. A what? 505 01:31:23,620 --> 01:31:25,440 What the shit? 506 01:31:26,400 --> 01:31:27,400 Tried to warn you. 507 01:31:27,860 --> 01:31:29,540 And who the fuck are you? 508 01:31:30,160 --> 01:31:32,000 Carol Danvers, but... 509 01:31:32,280 --> 01:31:35,340 I guess you can call me Captain Marvel. 510 01:31:36,300 --> 01:31:38,520 Phoenix. Oh, jeez. 511 01:31:38,920 --> 01:31:40,920 Red. You again? 512 01:31:42,300 --> 01:31:43,440 Cool costume. 513 01:31:44,600 --> 01:31:45,920 And you are? 514 01:31:48,040 --> 01:31:51,720 My name is Jean Grey, but you can call me Phoenix. 515 01:31:52,460 --> 01:31:57,440 I'm an Omega -level mutant, telekinetic and telepath, and a member of the X 516 01:31:57,440 --> 01:31:58,440 -Men. 517 01:31:58,520 --> 01:32:01,360 We've been trying to recruit this fucktard for a while. 518 01:32:02,270 --> 01:32:04,050 You know, before he kills the Marvel Universe. 519 01:32:04,590 --> 01:32:05,590 What happened? 520 01:32:06,430 --> 01:32:07,430 Cat got your tongue? 521 01:32:08,390 --> 01:32:11,950 She's speaking to me telepathically, you moron. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 522 01:32:12,230 --> 01:32:16,330 Whatever. Look, if you think I'd rather become a crime -fighting shit -swiffer 523 01:32:16,330 --> 01:32:20,510 who moves with a bunch of whiners than a bald, creepy guy who looks like Captain 524 01:32:20,510 --> 01:32:22,730 Picard, you are seriously mistaken. 525 01:32:23,510 --> 01:32:25,510 I'm here to shoot my very own poor parody man. 526 01:32:38,280 --> 01:32:40,660 In your dreams, dumbass. 527 01:32:42,480 --> 01:32:47,480 I mean, he's annoying, but all that spinning got me a little worked up. 528 01:32:47,860 --> 01:32:52,580 And the redhead is pretty fucking hot. I heard that. Oh, shit. 529 01:32:52,860 --> 01:32:54,140 No need to apologize. 530 01:32:54,840 --> 01:32:59,260 If you help me recruit him, I'll give your ass a phoenix raptor. 531 01:32:59,500 --> 01:33:00,880 Hmm. What's that? 532 01:33:01,320 --> 01:33:03,400 And what about this guy? 533 01:33:03,800 --> 01:33:06,920 Is he going to keep yapping the whole time if we do him? 534 01:33:07,370 --> 01:33:09,730 Just tune them out. I can use some dick. 535 01:33:10,030 --> 01:33:11,050 So can I. 536 01:33:27,830 --> 01:33:29,610 You think you can crack at it? 537 01:34:29,800 --> 01:34:32,380 What do you think about that DP when she strikes your cock? 538 01:34:33,000 --> 01:34:34,260 You think that's my pussy? 539 01:35:00,560 --> 01:35:01,560 Amen. 540 01:36:04,920 --> 01:36:07,660 You should see how good she eats pussy too 541 01:36:48,750 --> 01:36:49,750 Daphne. Oh. 542 01:36:50,670 --> 01:36:51,670 She's over there. 543 01:36:52,950 --> 01:36:54,530 What is that, like your fuck doll? 544 01:36:55,230 --> 01:36:56,830 Hey, don't talk about Daphne that way. 545 01:36:57,070 --> 01:36:58,290 We've spent a lot of time together. 546 01:36:59,350 --> 01:37:00,350 Keep sucking it. 547 01:37:01,230 --> 01:37:04,550 There you go, Captain Carol. Maybe I should give him the Phoenix Raptor in 548 01:37:04,550 --> 01:37:05,550 ass. You should. 549 01:37:05,710 --> 01:37:06,710 There you go. 550 01:37:09,630 --> 01:37:10,630 You're better than that. 551 01:37:12,110 --> 01:37:14,310 Apparently he's not aware of our powers. 552 01:37:15,110 --> 01:37:16,910 I am very aware of these powers. 553 01:37:33,960 --> 01:37:35,460 Ha ha ha ha! 554 01:38:14,900 --> 01:38:15,900 Didn't even see that coming. 555 01:39:06,160 --> 01:39:07,160 Super calm. 556 01:40:32,620 --> 01:40:33,860 Oh, fuck yeah. 557 01:42:55,200 --> 01:42:58,900 He's about to come early. 558 01:42:59,660 --> 01:43:01,460 He can't have that. 559 01:43:02,320 --> 01:43:04,300 You did? 560 01:43:04,720 --> 01:43:06,980 He must be lonely. 561 01:43:11,120 --> 01:43:12,120 Come here, cat. 562 01:43:34,830 --> 01:43:35,830 Hmm. 563 01:47:26,960 --> 01:47:28,560 You start yourself safety first. 564 01:47:36,560 --> 01:47:37,020 I 565 01:47:37,020 --> 01:47:51,280 wish 566 01:47:51,280 --> 01:47:52,280 you'd sit on my feet. 567 01:48:55,080 --> 01:48:56,600 He can call the shots if he makes me cum. 568 01:49:01,520 --> 01:49:02,520 Hopefully he does. 569 01:53:12,810 --> 01:53:14,150 Si, maestro, si. 570 01:53:15,370 --> 01:53:16,370 Buonanotte. 571 01:53:17,570 --> 01:53:20,190 DP, pussycat, you were magnificent. 572 01:53:21,270 --> 01:53:28,170 Girl, I think you have great potential, but you need the right person, the right 573 01:53:28,170 --> 01:53:33,170 guidance, the right hand to steer you towards stardom. Now, for a small 574 01:53:33,170 --> 01:53:39,590 fee, I can be that hand, all right? You know, I remember back in the 60s, and I 575 01:53:39,590 --> 01:53:41,930 was working with Brando, and I said, Marlon. 576 01:53:42,400 --> 01:53:46,100 I could take you to the top. Oh, my fucking God. 577 01:53:46,460 --> 01:53:48,760 I can't. 578 01:53:49,320 --> 01:53:50,680 Damn him. 579 01:53:51,140 --> 01:53:54,660 We worked with him on that. Then we worked with Liza Minnelli. Oh, 580 01:53:58,560 --> 01:53:59,560 shit. 581 01:54:00,560 --> 01:54:01,560 Nice. 582 01:54:03,500 --> 01:54:07,060 All right, guys. 583 01:54:08,000 --> 01:54:10,680 I think I'm finally at full power. 584 01:54:11,790 --> 01:54:12,810 You know what that means? 585 01:54:13,510 --> 01:54:16,670 It's unstoppable ass -kicker time. 586 01:54:18,310 --> 01:54:23,910 You know, like we did at the end of Thor and Thor Ragnarok. 587 01:54:25,750 --> 01:54:31,070 Anyways, I gotta go kill the snapper before he turns you all into dust. 588 01:54:32,330 --> 01:54:33,470 See you in the sequel. 589 01:54:34,910 --> 01:54:36,290 Captain Marvel out. 590 01:54:38,690 --> 01:54:39,690 Bye! 591 01:54:46,860 --> 01:54:48,880 Good idea for you to come and check out our school. 592 01:54:49,200 --> 01:54:52,140 I have a feeling you're gonna like Rogue. 593 01:54:55,760 --> 01:54:56,760 Well, Red. 594 01:54:58,680 --> 01:55:01,200 I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship. 595 01:55:20,010 --> 01:55:26,110 You're gonna pay for watching this one for the plot. 596 01:55:28,050 --> 01:55:32,870 You're gonna pay for the jokes. 597 01:55:36,590 --> 01:55:43,330 You will pretend you like the costumes and effects. 598 01:55:45,570 --> 01:55:49,050 Let's just be real. I'm calling. 599 01:55:52,660 --> 01:55:59,540 I know better, you've been losing this excuse 600 01:55:59,540 --> 01:56:00,700 before. 601 01:56:02,260 --> 01:56:06,960 Comics just won't get you off the...